The Year of the Blog

When I decided to start blogging, I had no idea what I was in for.  Everyone blogs.  It can't be that hard.  I began to spit thoughts through my fingers into my keyboard, simply hoping to get more comfortable writing.   I needed to find my voice.  I used to write.  A lot.  But mostly because of school.

Then life happened, kids happened, and darkness happened.

  I quit writing for pleasure.

 I found other outlets for my creativity as I explored my new role as a stay-at-home mom.  But I didn't write.  When I attempted to write, my words were unclear, pointless, and without personality.  

Maybe that was an expression of how I felt in life.  Stormy, stunned and speechless.


I always thought about writing.  Writing something.  Anything. I journaled, composed outlines, wrote teaching sessions for various groups I was involved in, articles for newsletters, and long philosophical emails to unsuspecting business or ministry partners.  I even composed wildly artistic blurbs while we were on family road trips.  Except these pieces of art were written in my head, not on paper.  So I forgot them.

Words still escaped me.  Blobs of words came through my fingers, but they were lacking.  Weak.  Pointless.  I struggled to express my everyday situations.  I desired to capture the beautiful moments that brought joy, the different personalities that I engaged with, and the frustrating moments that shape and challenged me.

The blinking cursor and I shared many stare-downs.

I bumbled around with a food blog (which is being updated!)  I posted some other blog entries sporadically but this past year I finally decided to take my blogging seriously.

I did a Pinterest search since Pinterest is a fantastical world of everything awesome.  Blogging pins flowed freely onto my new blogging board, my mouse clicking indiscriminately.  Then I began reading the blogs, articles, and websites that I had pinned.  A plethora of unfamiliar technology terms began swimming before my eyes like an aquarium of various tropical fish.  Exotic, colorful and meaningful yet without destination.  Layout options, trafficking tips, blog marketing, RSS, html?  Good grief.

Suddenly I felt like I was expected to fix a broken car transmission when all I knew how to do was attach jumper cables to the battery.

All I want to do is write.  I'm a teacher at heart so I can't help but throw a life lesson into everything I do, even my private musings.  But am I saying what I mean?  And do I really mean what I say?  How many of us do?

That wasn't a dumb choice. 

Nice polyester pants.  

I love second-hand smoke.  

Sure, I'll scrub your toilets.  

 I'm fine, really.

Our words are meaningful one moment but mere shadows the next.  Maybe this is why writers edit for days and yet and struggle to be content with the results.

What I found myself writing about didn't seem to fit a mold.  My mind's wanderings took unexpected twists and turns, unable to settle easily.  Gypsy-like.  Wild, organic, searching, and in need of refinement and maybe some granola.

Fireball Granola

But I've kept on writing.  Bits and pieces.  Here and there.  Last Spring I had a piece published in a Leadership newsletter.  But it wasn't my voice.  They accepted my piece after five revisions.  After I took the edge off.  After I dumbed down the message and sounded like every other contributing writer.  It was a great exercise in writing for a specific audience though so I don't regret a moment of it!

This past Fall, I began playing with the format of my blog, spending incredible amounts of time on format technicalities that sounded so easy and uncomplicated when watching the youtube.com tutorials.  They weren't so easy.  But I keep changing and modifying tiny things, here and there, determined to not let technology discourage me.

Last night I explored a fantastic blog about everything awesome in life.   These bloggers are the hip people we LOVE to HATE. I honed in on the photography blogs - pets, food, everyday items and moments, and self portraits.  Really?  Self-portraits scare me.  I'm a Gen Xer.  We don't take pics of ourselves.  Not usually, anyhow.  There are cool cats out there who take artistic self portraits whom the rest of us mock and secretly envy.  Getting over myself, I snapped my first pic to post in a blog.  Yep, I prefer to hide my true self from the world.  Don't we all?

Lil' old me.

I'm trying to take more pictures of my every day moments, hoping they bring me writing inspiration.  Or hoping my writing brings me photography inspiration.  I'm not sure which.   But I'll keep snapping away, reading photography blogs and tutorials, and I'm sure will learn some fantastic photography lessons along the way.  The odds are, if I take lots of pics, I'm bound to have a few that I actually like, right?

One of my first Instagram pics...

I believe it is.  And yes, I see my glass as half empty, in desperate need of a refill!

I have no idea what journey my blogging will take me on.  I've dedicated this year to making my blog a viable resource, blogging twice a week about my kids, cooking, leadership, and life experiences.  Life holds so much fascination for me - the daily adventures, hard lessons learned, moments of growth with my boys, the harsh realities and mind-blowing beauty in the world around me.  I'm hoping to capture just a snippet.  One life lesson, one blog, one picture at a time.


You May Also Enjoy:
*The fantastic blog - A Beautiful Mess 
*My blogging Pinterest board
*How to set up a blog using WordPress
*Blogging for Beginners